You have a duty to do at home which you cannot shun and yet be true to God and to your God-given trust. That which I now refer to has not been shown me definitely in your case, but in hundreds of similar cases; therefore when I see you falling into the same error into which many parents in this age of the world are falling I cannot excuse your neglect of duty. You have one child, one soul committed to your trust. But when you show such manifest weakness and lack of wisdom in training this one child, following your ideas rather than the Bible rule, how can you be trusted to teach and manage matters where the eternal interests of many are involved? (4T 381.1) MC VC

I address myself to both yourself and your wife. My position in the cause and work of God demands of me an expression in matters of discipline. Your example in your own domestic affairs will do a great injury to the cause of God. The gospel field is the world. You wish to sow the field with gospel truth, waiting for God to water the seed sown that it may bring forth fruit. You have entrusted to you a little plot of ground, but your own dooryard is left to grow up with brambles and thorns, while you are engaged in weeding others’ gardens. This is not a small work, but one of great moment. You are preaching the gospel to others; practice it yourself at home. You are indulging the whims and passions of a perverse child, and by so doing are cultivating traits of character which God hates and which make the child unhappy. Satan takes advantage of your neglect, and he controls the mind. You have a work to do to show that you understand the duties devolving upon a Christian father in molding the character of your child after the divine Pattern. Had you commenced this work in her infancy, it would be easy now, and the child would be far happier. But under your discipline the will and perversity of the child have all the while been strengthening. Now it will require greater severity, and more constant, persevering effort, to undo what you have been doing. If you cannot manage one little child that it is your special duty to control, you will be deficient in wisdom in managing the spiritual interests of the church of Christ. (4T 381.2) MC VC

There are errors lying at the very foundation of your experience that must be rooted out, and you must become a learner in the school of Christ. Open your eyes to discern where the difficulty lies, and then make haste to repent of these things and begin to work from a correct standpoint. Labor not in self, but in God. Put away pride, self-exaltation, and vanity, and learn of Christ the sweet lessons of the cross. You must give yourself unreservedly to the work. Be a living sacrifice upon the altar of God. (4T 382.1) MC VC

If the child of a minister manifests passion, and is indulged in nearly all its wants, it has an influence to counteract the testimonies God has given me for parents in regard to the proper management of their children. You are going directly contrary to the light that God has been pleased to give, and are choosing a picked-up theory of your own. But this experiment, so directly in opposition to the instructions of the word of God, must not be carried out to the injury of the very ones whom God would have us instruct in reference to the training of their children. (4T 382.2) MC VC

Your interest should not be swallowed up in your own family to the exclusion of others. If you share the hospitalities of your brethren, they may reasonably expect something in return. Identify your interests with those of parents and children, and seek to instruct and bless. Sanctify yourself to the work of God and be a blessing to those who entertain you, conversing with parents and in no case overlooking the children. Do not feel that your own little one is more precious in the sight of God than other children. You are liable to neglect others while petting and indulging your little one, and this very child gives evidence of your deficient management. She is guilty of acts of disobedience and passion as many times in a day as her will is crossed. What an influence is this to bring to bear upon families whom God is seeking to instruct and to reform from lax ideas in regard to discipline! (4T 382.3) MC VC