Chapter 4—Associations and Discipline
Dear Young Friends at Work in the Signs Office, (PH149 40)
I have been thinking much in regard to you and your religious life since I left the office. I was shown that the office of publication at Oakland should have the most strict discipline. In this age the young are so weak in moral power that they have but little strength to withstand temptation. (PH149 40.1)
Improper and Premature Courtships
The reason is, they are not truly changed in heart and therefore are unchanged in character. Young men and young women associating together, having weak principles and but little faith and devotion, become easily infatuated with each other and fancy they are in love. Their constant attention to one another soon has its influence, and spiritual things are not appreciated. As in the days before the flood, there is an influence to continually draw the mind from God, and to fasten the affections upon the human instead of the divine. The girls in the office, some of them, are entirely unprepared to serve God; their thoughts are vain and unconsecrated; they are superficial; they have not the fruits of the Christian life. They must have a deep and thorough conversion, or they will never see the kingdom of God. Now, these young persons associating together in the office, forming attachments with view to marriage, and giving themselves up to these attachments, are unfitting themselves for the 41work. They can not do their work with singleness of purpose, fidelity, and integrity. They are unfitted by this infatuation, and a demoralizing influence is felt all through the office. Young gentlemen and ladies leave their home and home influence and come to labor in the office; and it is a wrong done to their parents to form attachments and contract marriages without their counsel and advice in the matter. Such things grieve the Spirit of God. It is due their parents that they consult them in so important a step, and that they be aided by the experience and mature judgment of their parents. The young men or young women do not look beneath the surface; they see each other under the most favorable circumstances, and do not detect those traits of character which the mother, in her earnest interest for her son or daughter, sees, and knows will make or mar the happiness of those she loves. (PH149 40.2)
When these youth come to the office, the parents feel that they are safe under the guardianship of those in whom they have the highest confidence. Then how cruel to have this confidence abused! These young persons pair off, associate together, the young men escort the favored one to and from meeting, walk and ride together, with no parent’s eye to see or voice to warn; and these attentions ripen into stronger attachments, and marriages are contracted without the knowledge of the parents, and the fifth commandment is broken. (PH149 41.1)
Duty of Manager of the Office
These things should not be allowed in the Signs office. If they can not be broken up, dismiss the parties, write to their parents, and return them to their care and guardianship, making a plain statement of the case. I saw that foolish marriages would be entered into. Young girls are forward, not modest and retiring as they once were. They engage the attention of the young men, do the courting by seeking their attention, hanging around and talking with them. And it is a fact that the associations of the young men and women can not be encouraged without marriage being thought of and soon contracted. I write this to warn the young men and women not to be betrayed into foolish attachments which will prove their ruin in the end. Young men of promise in the office will be beguiled and infatuated with thoughts of marriage that should not enter their minds for years. Just as soon as the step is taken, farewell to their usefulness; they are fettered, and as far as rising higher and filling positions of trust, are useless. (PH149 42.1)
God will accept the services of the young men and young women, if they will consecrate themselves to Him without reserve. But when they begin to form these incautious, immature attachments, devotion, consecration, and religion are made of but little account. It is death to religious fervor, death to growth in grace. It is a time when the most solemn and serious thoughts should occupy the mind, and the most 43 (PH149 42.2)
thorough consecration should be cherished. We are forming characters; brick is laid upon brick, one upon another, and the structure is going up, a beautiful temple to God. These young men may rise to almost any height in intellectual advancement and spiritual power. I warn these young men not to marry, and the young ladies not to be given in marriage, until they have gained knowledge, experience, and success in their efforts to reach the high standard for which they have thought to aim.... (PH149 43.2)
Necessity of Rules and Discipline
I was shown that God is in no way honored or glorified in these marriages, and rules must be made to remove this influence from the office. Our youth must take a more elevated standard in the office if they would perfect Christian character. They should be present at the hour of prayer, at the prayer meeting, ready and zealous to do service for God. They want to understand the high claims of God upon them. Great learning is not required, genius or eloquence, but a pure, humble heart, longing for righteousness. If these young men and young women were one tenth as interested in refining the life and in elevating and ennobling the character, that they may do better and holier service for God, as in pleasing and gratifying self, a great and good work would be done by their noble efforts. These youth must habituate themselves to think of 44something more noble and elevating than themselves. They do not pray, do not watch unto prayer; they are unacquainted with Jesus. They have much to learn and but little time to learn it in; no time to spend in frivolity and gratification of self. If they will see the need of thorough conversion, if they will pray, and watch unto prayer, God will make them wholly His, and they may do much for His cause. But God is dishonored by the thoughts and behavior of many of the young in the office. Those who come to the office with good purposes are spoiled by the unconsecrated influence of some employed there. This must not longer exist. Plain talk and plain action must be taken in these cases. (PH149 43.1)
Portland, Ore., (PH149 44)
May 10, 1880. (PH149 44)