In this selection Ellen White is specifically addressing parents. Notice this up-to-date comment she makes about daughters trying to persuade their mothers to let them wear the latest exotic fashions: “Will you [the parents] allow them to tease this thing out of you, letting them mold you instead of molding them according to the principles of the gospel?” Clearly, some issues haven’t changed in parent-child relationships!
(PCP 35.1)
Adventists are sometimes perceived to be legalists. To support this criticism individuals will point to our church’s dress standards. Yet Ellen White’s comments on dress do not suggest legalism of any kind. Instead, the basic elements of the gospel are vividly present: humility, not drawing attention to oneself, concern for others’ feelings and needs, quality, taste, natural elegance. The question of dress reveals the foundation principles of Christianity.
(PCP 35.2)
Two other challenging questions receive attention in this reading: How should we discipline our children? And what is the relation of what we do in this present life to our future living in heaven?
(PCP 35.3)
Sermon
These words [2 Peter 1:1-13] should mean a great deal to us; and we should study this chapter diligently, that we may learn to practice the virtues it presents before us. If we do these things, the apostle says, we “shall never fall.” It is of great consequence to us in our spiritual experience that we have the assurance that we are treading securely and walking understandingly in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ.
(PCP 35.4)
I wish this afternoon to address particularly the parents and children. These should understand that they have solemn obligations resting upon them—the most solemn that ever rested upon mortals. Let parents take up their work and labor intelligently for the salvation of their families.
(PCP 36.1)
Children to be prepared for eternity
Fathers and mothers, we are verging upon the eternal world, and that which we should now most earnestly seek to understand is what we should do to inherit eternal life. If you will follow on to know the Lord, you will know that His going forth is prepared as the morning. We must prepare for the great crisis that is just before us. Will you not sense your responsibilities in regard to the education and training of your children in spiritual matters.
(PCP 36.2)
Here are the children. Your daughters are inclined, if they see a dress different from that which they have, to desire a dress similar to that. Or perhaps they want something else that they see others have, which you do not feel would be in accordance with your faith to grant them. Will you allow them to tease this thing out of you, letting them mold you instead of molding them according to the principles of the gospel? Our children are very precious in the sight of God. Let us teach them the word of God and train them in His ways. It is your privilege to teach your children to live so that they will have the commendation of heaven.
(PCP 36.3)
Are we preparing for heaven? We say we are; and we ought to be making ready for the future immortal life. We should be so conducting ourselves that we shall make right impressions upon those who are brought in contact with us. Let us not encourage our children to follow the fashions of the world; and if we will be faithful in giving them a right training, they will not do this. But if you let your children rule you, they will surely get away from the pure principles of the word of God and will walk in the ways of the world. Let them see how much the Lord sacrificed in their behalf when He came to this world. There was everything to oppose His advance, yet He gave us a perfect example in every detail of life—just the example that we follow and teach our children to follow.
(PCP 36.4)
Proper dress for children
Dress your children in simple and neat clothes, but do not let them have anything that they may suppose they want. They may ask for a dress that is cut low in the neck because it is the fashion to wear them so. Who has supposed such a fashion? It is not a right fashion, and we should not allow ourselves to consider it right. We should dress our children in such a way that they will learn to fashion their lives in simple orderly lines. We are to be preparing for the grand review that is soon to take place, and our children must have a part in this work of preparation. We want the light, the pure light of heaven, to shine into our hearts.
(PCP 36.5)
Heaven’s interest in children
All heaven is interested in our children, and parents grieve the Spirit of God when they fail to bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. Parents, be kind to your children, but be firm. Let them see that you mean all that you tell them. The fashions of the world often take a ridiculous form, and you must take a firm position against them. Our manner of dress, as well as our deportment, is to be a ministry, an education.
(PCP 37.1)
Parents, you are responsible for the work of bringing up your children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. These children need instruction line upon line, precept upon precept, here a little and there a little. You may feel annoyed sometimes because your children go contrary to what you have told them. But have you ever thought that many times you go contrary to what the Lord has commanded you to do that you might prepare yourselves for His work and know His will as revealed in His word? If you will follow on to know the Lord you can make a splendid representation of Christ before the world.
(PCP 37.2)
Gentleness in discipline
Never manifest passion when your children do wrong. When the mother gives her child a jerk or a blow, do you think it enables him to see the beauty of the Christian character? No indeed; it only tends to raise evil feelings in the heart, and the child is not corrected at all. We need to consider, as we endeavor to do our duty intelligently, that our children are to be brought into right relation to God, that they may have an entrance through the gates into the City of God and have right to all the advantages that heaven can give.
(PCP 37.3)
Husbands and wives united in forming children’s character
We have but little time now. Let us prepare earnestly for the solemn scenes of the future. The Lord would have us work under the direction of His word. It does not show any true love to let your children do as they please, and to think that in doing so they are doing just right. Husband and wife should be united in the work of seeking to form in their children correct habits of speech and conduct. If they will draw constantly in Christ’s lines, the will of Christ will be rule in their lives, and they will see of the salvation of God in their homes. Let them invite the Spirit of God to act His part in training the children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. With this power to help in every time of need, they will obtain the victory.
(PCP 37.4)
Has not God given you every evidence of His love? Did He not allow Jesus to come to this world as our pattern? Men could not endure the perfection of Christ’s character, and they took and crucified Him. There is a crucifixion that must go on in our lives, a constant dying to self and sin. We must walk circumspectly, that our lives may preach the gospel of Christ to those with whom we associate. If we will speak and walk circumspectly, the light of Christ will be revealed in our lives.
(PCP 38.1)
I desired at the beginning of my talk to speak these words to you. I leave them with you to think about. Let us be faithful to the duties of the home life. Let your children understand that obedience must reign there. Teach them to distinguish between that which is sensible and that which is foolish in the matter of dress, and furnish them with clothes that are neat and simple. As a people who are preparing for the soon return of Christ we should give to the world an example of modest dress in contrast with the prevailing fashion of the day. Talk these things over, and plan wisely what you will do, then carry out your plans in your families. Determine to be guided by higher principles than the notions and desires of your children.
(PCP 38.2)
Confession of heart to be sought
Parents need to come up on a higher platform. They have a sacred work to do in bringing their children into harmony with Christ. Parents, do not neglect this work. You need to move constantly in the counsel and fear of the Lord God of Israel. Talk with your children in regard to the lessons of the word; pray with them. Seek for confession of heart from them. Show them which is the wrong and which is the right way, and their need of yielding their wills to the will of God if they would be overcomers. I see many parents taking a course with their children that will shut them out of the kingdom of God. O that these might now repent, and seek to redeem the time, that God might help them to act their part.
(PCP 38.3)
I did not expect to speak more than a few words to you this afternoon. I want you to have the light and blessing that the Lord desires to give you. Reach out for these blessings, seek for a fitness for eternal life, that others may see that you are coming into harmony with heaven. When the soul takes its position on the side of right, all heaven is filled with rejoicing and praise and thanksgiving. Shall we not take hold with Christ to do our best? Pray with your children. Impress their minds with the thought that Christ was given to our world that we might love His beauty of character and seek to follow Him in every particular. If you will follow on to know the Lord, the blessing of God will rest upon you. We need to glorify God more than we do, to praise Him with uplifted soul. If we would study more faithfully the virtues of His character, we would desire to be more like Him. If in the minor points we would carry out the directions of the Lord, He will give us strength to follow Him in the large matters. We need to see the necessity of bringing the principles of the truth into every purpose and action of the life.
(PCP 38.4)
There is a large work to be carried on in this locality. Consider how God has wrought to bring these buildings into our possession. We have made every possible effort to establish the work in this place; and there are but few who know of the real difficulties we have had to meet. Now we are in possession and, for this I thank the Lord with heart and soul and voice.
(PCP 39.1)
A position contrary to the world
There are many here who will need to take their position directly contrary to the world’s customs and fashions. They may not want to do this, but this must make no difference. We are to have a large experience here in a little while, and everything should be brought into line with right principles. Here are men and women of capability. We want you to realize your capabilities, and act your part in carrying out the purposes of God for this place. Here are men who are preparing to enter on high positions of truth; but they are not ready for these positions. They need to be reconverted, and to let the blessing of God come into the life to transform the character. If those who come here to obtain an education will seek to help in every possible way, God will multiply blessings to them, and giving them His knowledge and His grace will make them overcomers through the blood of the Lamb and the word of their testimony. (Manuscript 45, 1911. Sermon at Loma Linda, California, November 6, 1911.).
(PCP 39.2)